Wednesday, October 20, 2010
See the picture of me? Yup, that's me and I took this picture because I wanted to share with the world how HAPPY I am. Also, you can see that my face has slimmed down a bit. So, yes, a month has passed and I am still going strong on my life-change journey. Usually, I would have quit by now by aches and pains and discouragement. Not once have I lost my motivation and I am super proud of that. In the past month the Poston girls flew to Panama City, Florida to visit my family. I totally went there thinking, "This is going to be great, have everything planned out, everyone is going to be so happy and visit so many people." Boy, was I very wrong! Everything was exactly the opposite. Granted, I love seeing my family and get to know my nephew but it was not what I had imagined it would have been. Needless to say it was a long 2 1/2 weeks. But, it made me realize that home is where you make it. Panama City is not home anymore. My home is here in San Diego with my husband, kids and stinky dogs. So, I didn't meet with old friends because basically I don't have any. I have 1 very good friend but she lived an hour away so we designated our time together and we spent 2 nice days together. What I did do, was keep with the routine of doing something physical and eating right. 3 days out of the week I went to a Stroll N Go group on the local navy base. It was nice to see some familiar faces! The women with this group are amazing and I wish I was a better participant in the past because I really got a good work out in plus I got to socialize. Also, I bought frozen Kashi entrees for my meals and when I ate out with family I made healthy choices and smaller portions.
Myfitnesspal.com is still a great tool and I use it every single day. I log everything that enters my mouth and I log all my exercises including strength. I also make sure to wear my heart rate monitor at every single workout and log calories burned. There was one Saturday in Panama City where I left the girls with my dad and I went to the gym. I was drenched with sweat and numb but I felt GREAT and I burnt 2098 calories!
So, I came home October 12th and I was in tears when I saw Eric at the airport. I missed him so much! Caitlin and Scarlett didn't want to leave because they were obviously spoiled there but when they saw Daddy, they quickly forgot about it. Unfortunately, the next day Aunt Flow came to visit me. With that I became very ill. I was having vision problems, fatigue, weakness, numbness on my face and extremities. For the life of me I couldn't figure out what was wrong. I thought maybe it's because I didn't consume enough calories. Got a nutrition bar, that didn't help me. Ok, maybe dehydrated for some reason even though I drink water constantly. I bought another bottle, that didn't help. I could not figure out what was wrong with me. I was at the commissary and I was standing in the rice aisle and I was at the point where I was looking at people nearby to let them know that I need an ambulance. I was ready to pass out. I trudged on though because my family has no food in the house. I made it home, ( I shouldn't have been driving) and I just wanted to fall out. i didn't of course because my babies needed me. Jason, a friend who was in town who used to work with Eric and is a Physician assistant wannabe said, " Maybe you are anemic." Then it clicked! I am freaking anemic duh! I have been so focused on eating right and being active I forgot all about the supplements I needed to take due to Gastric bypass. Stupid stupid me. So, Eric came home that day with my b12 formula to inject in me. I took iron and unfortunately no immediate relief. It takes a couple days to feel better after a severe deficiency like that. I should have gone to the hospital that day I was in the commissary but I am too stubborn. I need to listen to my body more. So, unfortunately, no workouts for 6 days due to traveling home and being ill. So, this past Monday I started back up with my low impact classes. I still wasn't feeling 100% better but I did it and only came away being a little light headed. Now it's Wednesday and I feel 100% and workout every day so far! My plan is to do a certain aerobics class Monday, Tuesday, and Friday and Wednesday and Thursday do Pilates or weights to build muscle!
Now on to the good stuff. My husband! I am a lucky girl. He supports me and enables me with my life change. We had a date day thanks to a church nearby who watches children for 5 hours for active military members. Originally, I wanted to go hiking! Yes, I want to go hiking! Of course, the weather has been crap and rainy so we mall walked instead. It's nice to hold his hand without pushing a stroller and yelling at a kid. Just us two walking together. Well, we went shopping! My goal was to find a dress for a wedding we are going to, which I did, but he was all about me getting the clothes I needed to work out in. That includes, underwear, bras, socks, pants and shirt. Mind you we only spent money at discounted stores. Ross, Marshalls, Nordstrom rack. We are cheap. We went into sporting goods store and had a blast in there day dreaming of adventures we want to go on. We were eyeballing a jogging stroller/bike trailer contraption. I immediately felt regret because I sold our jogging stroller right before I decided to change. So, this contraption was like a Cadillac. Has all the bells and whistles and the guy who was trying to sell it to us was throwing discounts left and right at us. Still too expensive though. So, Eric when he got home immediately went researching and now I am a proud owner of B.O.B Ironman edition jogging stroller. It is a new to me but used and off of craigslist. It's unfortunate that the weather has been rainy non-stop because I am itching to take it for a spin with the girls. Caitlin is also ready to get in it because it's yellow. It's her favorite color. So, yes my husband supports me and is very pleased with all the changes because they are all positive. That night we had a talk and it was said, that basically if I kept on with my sedentary lifestyle and depressing moods we probably wouldn't make it as a couple. I am not going to lie, it was hard to hear that and I was angry but it wasn't him that I was angry with. It was myself. I had blinders on. How in the world did I not see it form his perspective? Denial... of course. When we met, I was active, spontaneous and I just wasn't that person that he fell in love with. Needless to say I had to take benadryl that night to get to sleep since my mind was going though a lot. I let him know though that marriage is a partnership and we both have to keep it going and make small changes. Not just one person and he fully agrees. I don't want our marriage to be another divorce statistic in young couples. I also let him know that I am doing this change for me because let's face it without a happy wife/momma you don't have a happy home. I am excited to say this is still the beginning but I am very proud of the changes thus far. I am also very realistic, I know weight comes off quickly in the beginning and then steadily come off, I know I will hit plateaus but it's not about weight or numbers on the scale. It's about being healthy in the mind and body.
Some changes I like that I am experiencing is: I am more assertive. I am more opinionated.( I used to be a door mat and let people make decisions for me.) I am more confident in my abilities in performance and appearance. I ASK FOR HELP instead of giving up after being discouraged. I am focused, I am also competitive with myself. Best of all MOTIVATED.
Eric told me last night that he is happy to have his wife back! Me too. I love me. I love becoming the person I am becoming and I will NOT let anyone discourage me.
(I have already had some haters on facebook but guess what? There is a delete button. Teehee.)
Anyways, I must show off my loot.
Not pictured is the plethora of undies, sock, and food scale. Pictured is new B.O.B jogger, some clothing.